Shark cartilage possesses a mean bite

Last month I was in Wal-Mart, and I aimlessly wandered into the vitamin aisle. There were hundreds of nutritional supplement items, but one caught my attention — shark cartilage.

Unfortunately, the label contained little information pertaining to what the product actually does, such as make one lose weight or grow a dorsal fin.

As a kid, I used to see "Jaws" on my wall at bedtime. Now I see health companies trying to withhold routine information on Jaws' cousins.

Can you keep a secret?

Can you keep a secret?

Last week, I met with a special agent from the Department of Defense. I had my shrubbery costume ready (luckily, there were no dogs around), but it wasn't necessary. The agent led me into a room in the Crawfordsville Armory, looked both ways and closed the door. The questioning was ready to begin.

Truth, justice and the Southern way

Anyone fed up with the government? Ready to turn in your "Made in the U.S.A." clothing? You could have a chance to do just that — if you move south.

Southern Party organizers have registered with the secretaries of state in Florida, Georgia, Texas and Virginia, according to the Associated Press. The party hopes to establish ties in all former Confederate States plus six border states and eventually secede from the Union, a la the Civil War.

Words ... words ...

Last weekend, I was tangled in a crazy game of H-O-R-S-E with my cousins.

For those of you unfamiliar with the game, or think it is somehow tied to the Kentucky Derby, the game is simple. Make a basket (shoot, don't weave), and if the person behind you misses, they get a letter. You keep playing until you spell "horse." There are many versions of the game, including H-O-R-S-E-S, P-I-G, and a personal favorite, D-R-O-M-E-D-A-R-Y.

But which is more important to the game – athletic skill to make a shot, or being able to spell?

Birds are respected, taste good too

One man's meal has become another man's menace.

Go visit Key West, Fla., and see the melees on the streets. The town is not infested with teen-aged gangs causing trouble. Instead, chickens decorate the roads like I-74 construction cones.

The Associated Press reported the problem, according to one local, is that the chickens "are meaner than anything." The local law allows no chicken harassment. Some residents throw ice cubes at the birds because the cubes melt, unlike rocks or javelins.

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Random News

Coders in the movies, one more time

No score and four years ago (sorry, but I visited Gettysburg this weekend), I wrote a column about the presence of computer programming in movies. The idea spawned from a viewing of Swordfish, but of course in recent times, if a movie didn't have some type of computer in them, the younger generation would probably be confused.

It's March, which means it's time for basketball

You'll notice that I haven't been writing much, for a few good reasons. At work, we've been pretty busy, and we just moved into a different office. In my spare time, I've been devoting most of my time sending out book queries and proposals and also working on my girlfriend's school's website.

But let's face it: The important thing happening right now is men's college basketball. Who will win their conference tournaments? Which teams will make it to the Big Dance? What team will win it all?

There are two important links you need at this stage:

Mix your music with GarageBand

Attention Windows shoppers: You may want to glaze over the next few paragraphs, because this isn't for you.

It is, however, for music lovers who wish to create your own beats on a Mac. I have been using GarageBand for a month or so, and I'm pretty confident that I have the next album to go platinum stored right here on my machine. OK, maybe it's not that good, but at the very least, it's fun to make your own mixes.

Richard Simmons weighs in on 'The Developers'

While it's doubtful Richard Simmons has already finished reading my book, "The Developers," it is worth noting that he already has good things to say about it.

Simmons, who is constantly referenced in the book as a lookalike of one of the characters, Rex Burns, recently responded to the book copy I sent him at his Burbank location.

"Thank you for your kind words and sense of humor," Simmons wrote on an autographed photo. "You are a gifted man!"

Naming your new company

Do you have a great idea for a new invention? Do you have the perfect business plan to make millions? Do you have the means to bring peace to the world and bring a fortune to yourself?

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