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One big disadvantage working at night is the television quality when I arrive home. Sometimes there could be a "Perfect Strangers" rerun or two, and possibly an old game show, but most channels are overrun by infomercials.

Webster defines an infomercial as "a long television commercial, often made to resemble a talk show, educational demonstration, interview, etc." Kudos to Webster's assessment. The only words missing from the definition are "trash," "ridiculous" and "cheap."

Now's the time to become a pirate

There are a plenty of new careers and opportunities these days, yet you rarely see anyone entering the piracy field. Some people have invented their own versions of a shipwrecked pirate - stealing stereos, hacking into computer files, playing baseball in Pittsburgh - but few take their chances on the high seas.

On the other hand, the Assocated Press said pirates killed more people in 1998 than the year before. The International Maritime Bureau reported Malaysian pirates, who killed 67 crewmen last year, are "getting increasingly violent."

Pirates? Violent?

Peeps do not fare well when put to the test

Easter has come and gone like a gypsy caravan once again, but one thing still remains — Easter candy. Checking expiration dates on bags and containers, 1999 Easter candy should last until 2450. People decide to buy candy following the holiday in hopes of big bargains.

A specific type of candy has intrigued many and plagued worldwide analysists with a simple question, "What is a Peep?"

Baseball and math add up

Today we will discuss a simple mathematical equation.

Baseball = Life

On the surface, it's a pretty simple equation. But it can be expanded to read the following: stitches/323(Yankees) * Concession stands^3+tickets - 37(fungoes) = Life

So many firsts, so little time

The race is on for the first millennium baby. Some experts believe the race should start sometime next week. Every year, the first birth is always an interesting event. Think of the accolades the first-born 2000 baby will receive.

Unfortunately, there's a better chance of seeing Burt Reynolds at a polka convention than predicting the day your child will be born.

From the Archive

Online library checking in

Google, never to turn away from indexing searchable material, is working with leading world libraries to catalog a ridiculous number of books.

Harvard, Stanford and Michigan university libraries, the New York Public Library and the Oxford Bodleian Library are lending their books to be scanned into the Google Print project. Melvil Dewey, the inventor of the Dewey Decimal System, could not be reached for comment.

Microsoft "fixes" Internet Explorer

Microsoft is urging its users to download a cumulative software patch that corrects at least three major security issues in its standard Web browser, Internet Explorer.

If you're not sure if you should perform this update, check the July 2004 Windows Security Update page by clicking here. Hopefully if you use a PC, you are familiar with the update process, but if not, it's pretty easy to do. Just find Windows Update under the Start menu, and follow the directions.

The Internet really isn't that heavy

Have you ever wondered how many people are on the Internet in a given day? Yeah, me neither.

Tell Congress to preserve the free and open Internet today

Usually, I prefer to put the news in my own words, but MoveOn.Org does a pretty good job of explaining Congress' latest attempt to try to rearrange the Internet.

From MoveOn.Org:

Do you buy books online, use Google, or download to an Ipod? These activities, plus MoveOn's online organizing ability, will be hurt if Congress passes a radical law that gives giant corporations more control over the Internet.

Hate sites that apparently don't suck

Not all people troll the Internet looking for happy things like puppies, flowers and pot pies. While you could certainly find them, they are not nearly as easy to find as corporate hate sites. Maybe hate is a strong word ... then again, after checking out some of them, hate is pretty mild. "Loathe" and "personal vendetta" come to mind when describing them.

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